Tuesday, June 21, 2011

You Can't Please Everyone!

My two biggest fans!!!
The one thing I hate the most about losing weight is some of the nasty comments I get.  I have been doing pretty well for myself since baby J was born.  It has been really hard, because for some reason, my body has a really hard time losing when I am nursing.  But with a healthy diet and exercise I have been able to start getting those unwanted pounds off.  After I get the baby weight off, I still have about 30 additional pounds to get off to be the ideal weight and size for my bone structure.

You would think people would be happy and encouraging about it, but the sad truth is, only a few of my dear friends and some family members are.  There is a major chunk of people in life that are totally irritated with me every time I choose to get healthy.  I get comments like this:

"I can't believe you are losing weight while you are nursing!  That is so unhealthy for your baby!"  Just for the record, I would NEVER do anything to hurt my baby!  What an insult to my intelligence!

I get this one too:

"You don't need to lose weight!  If you lose anymore you will be unhealthy,"  This is just stupid, if you look at me and my rolls you know I am not at a healthy weight.  I don't dream of being a size 2, I just want to be healthy and strong and there is nothing wrong with that.

Or:

"It wouldn't hurt to lose a few pounds."  A little rude but honest -- I appreciate that!  Problem is, you can't please everyone!  People get irritated if you are fat, and then when you lose weight others are irritated at that! You can't win!

You know, I just decided that I can't let people tell me how to live.  First off, the ones who really love me are proud of me for my hard work.  The ones that have issues with it are probably just jealous and want to tear me down too.  I guess making a huge change in your life is going to ruffle some feathers one way or another.  That's life!  Last time I was fat, about two years ago, and almost 300 pounds I had a friend who was about 50 pounds lighter than I was, but still heavy set, and she would talk all the time to me about how people just don't understand us "bigger" women.  Then I started to lose weight and she didn't... then I passed her up... and then when I was like 5 sizes smaller than she was, she told me that she felt she couldn't trust me anymore.  What the heck?!  Seriously?!  I got untrustworthy because I lost weight...  whatever!

Making big life changes can really weed out your friends:  true friends vs. friends of convenience.  I hated the fact that I had friends who hung around me when I was fat because I made them feel better about themselves!  Can you believe there are people like that out there?!  I didn't know it until then.

Now, I am trying to get in shape again after this pregnancy totally kicked my butt, mainly due to the sciatica that wouldn't let me workout. I know there are a lot of you out there working towards the same goal and I just want you to know that I am proud of all your hard work!  I hope I am never one of those fair-weather friends.

Meanwhile, I am thinking of carrying around one of the boys' Nerf Guns and popping people between the eyes who have snooty comments about my looks... because gosh darn-it, I work hard and deserve to be happy!  Don't you?




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8 comments:

Andrea said...

Cat-

I think it's wonderful you're making life changes to be healthy and strong. It takes a lot of guts to change the way you do things and try to improve your life. I'm proud of you and I hope you continue to work hard no matter what other people say. I had a hard time losing the weight after number 3 also, don't be too hard on yourself. :) Hugs!

Andrea

Jill said...

Well, for the record, I've always thought you are doing amazing. It does take hard work.

Anika and Sean said...

It's kinda surprising the events in your life that will show you who your friends are. When I got into my really bad car accident, I found out I had a lot of friends that wanted me to be their shoulder to cry on, their source of support for hard times, but when I was crippled for 2 months and basically alone... they were nowhere to be seen. It was just a little shocking.

I think you are amazing by the way. I don't know how you manage to stay so active (physically and with things like blogging) with 3 kids and being husbandless most of the time.

Sasha said...

Geez that is ridiculous. I think your friend just might have felt left out and unhappy with herself. But either way that sucks.
Losing weight is really tough, so congrats on the loss!

Phannie said...

I'm sorry that you get all those rude comments. I glad you don't let it get you down. You are doing great and if you feel awesome then that's all that matters.

On a completely different note, I was wondering about your exercising and nursing. Does your exercising affect your milk production? If it does, I was wondering how you keep it up? Do you have to increase your calories? Last time I had a really hard time keeping up my milk when I exercised. If I ate like I was pregnant I was okay usually. Were your other nursing experiences the same? Just thought I would ask. I want to run the Wasatch Back next year and I'm afraid I wont be able to train AND nurse at the same time. Thoughts?

Mama Nut said...

Exercising hasn't really affected my milk supply much. But then again I take Fenugreek vitamin supplements a couple times a day and it keeps up my supply pretty good.

All of my nursing experiences were different. This has been the best one, I think because I know what my body needs better and what my baby needs.

I do find it harder to run because I "bounce." But I just make sure I feed first and wear a tight running bra.

Heidi said...

Sorry you are having to deal with this stuff again. What a pain! Way to be positive and weed out all the hangers on. You haven't passed me up in weight loss yet so I'm still your friend ;) hehehe. No that wouldn't change our relationship ever. You're the Best!! Hope it gets better and not worse. Luvs always!!

Cammy said...

Cat,

I have a hard time losing weight when nursing too and it is hard not to get discouraged by it too. I always seem to hit a point where I just say "who cares, it doesn't make a difference anyway." Honestly though it does make a difference even if it is just in how I feel.

Keep up the good work despite life's little setbacks. We are here cheering you on! Go Cat Go!